Reminiscing

I remember when I thought I could draw because I could draw the same thing over again. I remember how every time I drew it it's beauty deteriorated.

I remember how for seven years of my life books and a blanket were all I needed. I remember the week I stopped reading and found a friend, I never finished the book.

I remember the color Orange and how it helped me out of depression so skillfully that no one ever knew I was sad. I remember how people asked me if I was okay when I wasn't wearing Orange.

I remember Garrett asking me what I would do when I stopped liking the color. I remember how I heard him voice this question in my head for a month. I remember how I haven't worn orange in two week and no one has commented.

I remember how shy I was and how home was never was the place I would go to after school. I remember Jimmy and how after three years of  friendship ended with a walk home from school bus.

I remember when I ran from home because my brother went too far with a prank. I remember how most of the images of my neighborhood, that I remember, come from that night.

I remember chasing my sister in my underwear because that same brother told me too. I remember it was fun.

I remember how me and that sister were never very close.  I remember how she only tried to fix the problem when she was to go to Alabama for 18 months.

I remember that three weeks ago I was 18. I remember thinking " What I have done to get to this point in my life?" I remember realizing that the answer was nothing.

I remember trying to place those emotions in a poem. I remember not yet finishing it because feelings were too strong. I remember the friend that helped me through those emotions.

I remember being on ADD meds since I was 7 and how I didn't feel emotions until half-way through my 18th year.

I remember stopping my ADD meds almost 8 months ago. I remember the days in those nine years that I didn't take the the pill.

I remember how my family thought unmedicated me was the enemy. I remember on those days I felt free.

I remember running freely after a frog. I remember running in mud in flip-flops and having them stick in the mud, and brake. I remember not catching the frog

I remember that I have always worn out shoes in four months. I remember how my shoes just ripped after three weeks. 

I remember becoming great friends with anybody in two weeks. I remember fading away from them after three months. 

I remember that happy things too. Yet I also I remember writing this with motives of sadness.   

                             -Joshua Salmond ( Feathers On Fish )